Complaining; it comes as easy as falling off a log to all of us. To some it's a way of life. But others, walk around hunched over, you can actually see them carrying the weight of their discontent, but they say nothing and wonder why nobody hears their inner frustration.
Why do people complain?
The Bible has a clear answer, in James chapter 4 verses 1-3.
1 Where do those fights and quarrels among you come from? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? 2 You want something you don't have, and you will do anything to get it. You will even kill! But you still cannot get what you want. So you argue and fight. You don't get what you want because you don't ask [in this case] God. 3 You ask for something but do not get it because you ask for it for the wrong reason—for your own pleasure. (Version mix.)
Depending on the circumstance we can all become disgruntled. That particular set of things, seem to conspire to push the one button, on the one nerve, we have left, and the pressure valve blows.
In mechanical systems, designed to utilize pressure as function, a pressure relief valve is necessary to protect the system from pressure damage, it's proper operation.
Pressurized people experience unresolved internal build up, and use this is as an excuse for poor responses. “Drama Queens” rarely consider others at all, unless it's to their advantage. They live out of tune to the hurt they bring to those around.
This may protect the mechanics of the complainer, short-sightedly-living in their quick fix or another temporary cover-up, but it invests in their slow breakdown of health over-all.
The human comparison fails, when pressure build up comes only from perceived difficulty; or preference. Yes, sometimes we prefer things we don't like, because it's the answer we know, or it's attached to an end result we want. Unfortunately, this can leave us with an unwillingness to do the work to go through, a feeling of being trapped, and so we low-level-panic, which is 'complaining'.
Even when we avoid actual difficulty, through constructive avenues, we can feel the same way. As in the verses above, it's clear this comes from desires for our own preference, without consideration of others needs or desires, or constructive effort. So disgruntled behaviour is recognized as childish and not valid. Complainers aren't willing to move in a new way, producing a feedback loop, a sense of injustice, within themselves, but really it's a result of the emotionally selfish choices made along the way.
A particular trait in another person, rubbing the inner wound you've been nursing, can stimulate impulses of defensiveness.
But here's the crux of it all. We are not merely machines, we are software and programmers of our own experience, free will beings, who can choose different responses to concerns, not just capping the pressure repeatedly, but by addressing reasons for them.
My dad taught me a little about boxing growing up, and although there are many ways to avoid getting hit in moments, what was most important was how to respond once hit.
He lived this; 'It's not IF we get knocked down in life, but HOW we get back up that's most valuable.' Not out of fear to avoid, or anger to attack, but from focus, to navigate the whole experience well; for the long run.
A boxer fights, keeping their orientation on the whole fight, including the value of their opponent. A brawler exhausts themselves, fighting their own anger, fear, or desires; alone, against all these enemies. In life this can drain our composure in an alarming manner. No; mastering ourselves and applying patient, precise blows, is the way.
So, there are both appropriate times and ways to make a point. Such as letters to the editor, counselling sessions, and intimate conversations with friends. Grumbling, raging or burying it is of no productive value.
For example, on June 7th, we have the opportunity to vote for our new Provincial Government. Entrenched as a right in our country, it allows everyone a say in the immediate future of the province. Realistically, our opinion is not the only one, a blessing really; hopefully clearer heads prevail, but we remain partly responsible if we do not vote.
So if you are a person who doesn't vote Provincially, or even Federally, you are the one, the rest of us could rightfully complain about. Although, those who take responsible action, vote regularly and are most often not complainers. They have a option to speak up through the right channels and take it. Complaining about government if you don't vote is hollow, a sounding gong. It becomes bla, bla, bla.
Your silence is the only valuable thing left, if you don't vote.
So get out there and feel the power of living responsibly, even after the results are in.
Thank you for all your help in promoting this worthy cause. Loved the editorial cartoon last week [in The Standard Newspaper]!
Sunday was the culmination of months of planning. The Port Perry community spirit came thru in flying colours. We had 90 registered walkers, for the First Port Perry Walk for Dog Guides, and over $8,000 raised. We had targeted $2,614. Thank you.
Drone footage and the pictures show that 200+ people actually walked. Such a great event could not have happened without the tireless efforts of all the members of the organizing committee, (Anna, John, Livia, Scott, Sue), their spouses (Kevin. Andrew, Cindy, Deborah, Pam, Steve), the volunteers, Cohen Tymon as Spot the Pet Valu mascot, Halo Tymon who did a great job stamping hands, the sponsors, the photographers (Steve, Franco and Alexander), the Dukes and the Lions. And the local press coverage. Thank you. I am so humbled.
A special thanks goes out to the Old Flame Brewery for providing such a dog friendly environment to finish the walk, Terry and Christine Vos for their generous donations, support and lunch, Tony Jansen of PP Print for the banner, Toiné Lahner and her service dog York for their inspiration, Ginger Jackson of McDonalds for the coffee, Foodland for the water, Hanks for the their famous apple fritters, the Durham Ukulele Klu, the "Dukes" for all the music, the local Pet Valu and Paulmacs for all the donations and support, and the local Port Perry Lions.
Thank you to all our sponsors for the wonderful silent auction items. Abbey Rose Florist, Anja of Sweden, Brooks Feeds, Framer’s Gallery, Oakridge Golf Club, Old Flame Brewery, Pet Valu in Port Perry, Sirtawn Systems, Paulmacs in Port Perry and Tribal Voices. Thank you CIBC, Scotiabank, Port Perry Marina, Canadian Tire Port Perry, Gus Brown and the Design Coalition.
This was a dream of mine, to do for the community, since we moved here. Never did I dream of such a success. It was hard to narrow down the pictures to 42, to put on the Facebook! It was nice to see everyone enjoying themselves. The National Walk Day is now established as an annual Port Perry tradition, for the last Sunday of May. Please mark May 26th, 2019 for next year. Hope to see everyone next year. It will be an even better walk!
Chair, 1st Port Perry Pet Valu Walk for Dog Guides, May 27th, at 10:30 a.m., at Palmer Park
Giving Canadians a New Leash on Life
Thank you for the opportunity to respond to Marion Keigh's letter. I appreciated meeting with her at the on-site announcement of Scugog Island receiving a $6,366,000.00 grant from our MPP, Granville Anderson, for natural gas expansion.
Marion always likes to keep me on my game. I will try to update everyone on the situations she mentioned. I have tried very hard for years, to get natural gas and high speed internet on the Island.
We must appreciate the fact that the installations can't be performed quickly. Even after the long hard winter we just witnessed, Communicate Freely feels confident that over 80% of the island will be ready for the new ultra fast fibre optic internet service by next spring. The grant money received from the federal government contains conditions that must be met before the funding is awarded. The timing and the number of customers is mandated by the expectations of the government. The east side of the island, the Aldered's Beach area, is currently in the process of receiving the necessary infrastructure for high speed internet.
Communicate Freely is doing their best to hook up as many customers as possible.
I have worked diligently with four different Enbridge Gas municipal affairs representatives to bring a cost efficient heating source to the island in the form of natural gas. This will save the average home over $1,500 per year and is also the greenest choice for our future as a greenbelt community. The goal of Enbridge is to have over 90% of the island serviced by 2020. Scugog Island was number two out of many applicants with only the top ten 10 of those receiving grant money from the Ontario government and we thank them.
A second entrance from 7A on to the Island was first identified as a concern over twenty years ago. In 2002, a Fire Safety Study was performed. The conclusion of that study stated that a second entrance was a necessity to ensure the safety of the Island residents. Over the years, most Island residents have been denied entrance to the Island due to road closures as a result of automobile accidents. The majority of the time, the accidents occur at the intersection of 7A and Island Road, effectively cutting off the only route on to the Island. This is not only a major concern for fire and emergency vehicles, it can also result in other safety concerns. Among those concerns are the inability of caregivers to access the people relying on them and the concern of parents waiting for school buses to deliver their children home safely. Most of the accidents at that intersection, involve lengthy closures, at times lasting for several hours which severely curtails the response time for any emergency services. Lives depend on the ability of those services to reach the people on the Island.
Sincerely, Don Kett, Township of Scugog Ward 3 Councillor
Our recent annual yard sale, May 10th & 11th, was a huge success. We had a great selection of home-baked goodies as well as a very large variety of donated items. The dollars we raised will continue to support our various missions projects both locally and globally.
Thank you to all who donated and thank you to the wonderful community of folks who partonized the sale. We also thank all the volunteers who gave of their time and energy. Most of all, thanks to God for good weather and our wonderful community. We are blessed.
Archie & Reta Barnhoorn
for the Missions Committee of Emmanuel Community Church
P.S. See you all next year!
“All animals are created equal but some are more equal than others.” George Orwell, Animal Farm (1995), Ch. 10
Contrary to claims that natural gas will benefit every household on Scugog Island, the fact is that hundreds of homes will not get this service.
Contrary to the widespread belief that everyone on Scugog Island now has access to high speed Internet, the fact is that only those households west of Island Road can receive this new service. Roughly two-thirds of the Island cannot.
However, what many ‘have-nots’ will get, is an end to the peaceful enjoyment of their properties, replaced with a steady stream of traffic, as Councillor Kett pushes for a multi-million dollar second access road through the Island.
If Island Road is so accident-prone, then shouldn’t we adopt measures to make it safer, rather than expand the problems to collector roads such as Ashbridge, Head, Ma Brown’s, etc? The long-term advantages of reducing accidents, by changing the status-quo on Island Road, would have significant benefits for everyone in so many ways.
Marion Keigh, Scugog Island
For some years now, we, at The Standard, have been sensing an increasing desire to equip those in less fortunate circumstances with the necessities of life, so they can get on with thriving, and the business of living.
Our paper has never been about large profit for us, but rather the equipping of those in our area of distribution, and others struggling in their communities, with the tools they need to function in business and their personal lives better. As such we have instituted many programs to enable young people to: establish themselves as entrepreneurs, grow in skills in chosen fields, and introduce them to other possibilities as well. We are proud of their results so far. “Way to Grow!”
Until now the Standard has had little profit margin, in terms of our pocket book, but when it has, it's given out of it's overflow to charitable causes locally and around the world, always, not to mention it's avid focus on the good news in our communities and the charitable works individuals in them pursue. But financially this effort has fluctuated at approximately 10% of our monetary bottom line. The necessity of business demands we retain more than we wish, as a hedge for future needs. This we want to challenge, as a business entity and in our daily living, and we desire to pass that challenge in some small way on to you.. 'Giving' is financial in one manner, and is contagious in it's various forms, a manner of being toward others. It's not the government, or just organizations, it's the fact they are made up of 'You'; so it's you, who can aid another along your way. Let's take the time, we can spend it on others. A kind word, helping hand, or coming to the aid of those in distress, refreshes your own life.
It is said, 'money is a terrible master but an excellent servant', and so we are endeavouring to master it's use as a servant of blessing. Money should not bring a sense of debt, but rather be used as a tool to enable freedom, that's it's real gift. Desire to hoard it beyond our needs, stimulates a perversion of it's power and corrupts the purity of it's service in our lives; as “the love of money is the 'root of ' (leading to) all kinds of evil.” This can master our preoccupation, compromising judgment, and we can become money's compulsive slave.
To invert much of this tainted influence we are aspiring to give more, helping others. In addition we are aspiring to draw others into this 'no strings attached' stream of charitable existence along with us.
The right thing carries it's own reward, the inner feeling of integrity. For example, without expecting any financial reward, we can help our police with tips, it's just the right thing to do. We could never pay these day to day heroes for what their service is worth, but we may help them feel less alone in the fight to protect our lives and properties, possibly preventing discouragement of the police officer and so the system. Besides, money seeking tipsters have pretty much strained the bank on that one. Giving our officers all the help they require, makes sense, even from a selfish standpoint. Let's be additional eyes, their reporting coalition, and let them know we see them as part of the community with us; that's incredible value to wake up to. It may also keep your tax dollars down. Be charitable to the Police, in doing so you will reap what you sow.
So, now, when you patronize the Standard, a range closer to 20%, after ensuring our own employees are covered and overhead is cleared, will go to various charities. This means customers, buying at the businesses advertised in our paper, can feel this extra benefit. These are tax credit exempt donations we give, as we are interested in the charitable giving not the government coverage of the gifts, they have nothing to do with this. We're tapping into a stream beyond the Governments reach, it's heart.
It requires nothing of the businesses you patronize, except they advertise in our paper. They get the good feeling of being associated with helping the needs of others, beyond their own sales. So this is an expression of our community and you as part of it, helping other communities and the individuals in them with a step up in life, that's it's own reward. It's a kindness handshake.
Our carriers get this awareness every time they deliver The Standard to you. The idea that through this cascade of mutual benefit, the customer of one of our advertisers will know, The Standard, as a representative of everyone's interactive flow in the community, is giving to help others. It's helping others along our way, no strings attached. Isn't that what real life's about? Let's raise the standard for the lives of others, and build it into the function of our community.
On behalf of (Anna, John, Livia, Scott and Sue), the organizing committee of the 1st Port Perry Pet Valu walk for dog guides, I would like to thank the community for their support, during our awareness drive at the Smartcenter this past Saturday.
We also raised $262 towards the walk.
The walk for dog guides is to be held May 27th, at 10:30 a.m., at Palmer Park.
Chair, 1st Port Perry Pet Valu
Walk for Dog Guides
It’s a beautiful sunny Earth Day in Uxbridge, and fifteen volunteers are collecting garbage beside the Trestle bridge, along the John McCutcheon Way and the Great Trail. Old tires in the Uxbridge Brook, construction waste dumped into the ditch, Christmas yard ornaments, pop cans, plastic bottles and golf balls are all hauled out. There is feeling of accomplishment and optimism that offers us hope for our earth.
Meanwhile. along the Barton Trail, just minutes away, a family has decided to practise their golf swing and they are firing golf balls into the pond and surrounding area. If they do not collect all the balls, they are now contributing to the litter on our trails and natural areas.
In the USA, it is estimated over 300 million balls are lost or discarded every year, so, based on population comparisons, it could be estimated that the numbers could be approximately 30 million for Canada. In 2009, a Danish Golf Association devised a number of tests to determine the environmental impact of golf balls on their surroundings. It was found that during decomposition, golf balls dissolved to release a high quantity of heavy metals. Dangerous levels of zinc were found in the synthetic rubber filling used in solid core golf balls. When submerged in water, the zinc attached itself to the ground sediment and poisoned the surrounding flora and fauna.
In California, a local high school working with Monterey Aquarium collected thousands of golf balls in the ocean, near a golf course. Older golf balls are filled with elastic and as the ball decomposes it resembles seaweed in the ocean. Students have produced a video telling about the problem and possible toxic effects on the fish.
The breakdown of golf ball plastic also adds to the microplastic pollution problem found all over the world. The breakdown is very slow, so the impact may not be felt for perhaps a hundred years. What have we left for our grandchildren to deal with?
While you are out on the trails collect a few balls and reduce the litter today, rather than passing it on for someone else to deal with in the future. “Fore!” is a warning cry to look out for golf balls: we should heed it!
Derek Connelly, Trail Volunteer, President of North Durham Nature
Originally addressed to Cathie Ritchie, Clerk, City of Kawartha Lakes
I read in the Standard newspaper about the delegation that presented a petition to Council to introduce a “trap, neuter and release” (TNR) program for feral cats in the City of Kawartha Lakes.
I wish to advise you that I am strongly opposed to such an initiative. Feral and free-ranging cats are a devastating influence on native wildlife, both here and around the world. Single-handedly they are the greatest cause of avian mortality, outweighing almost all other factors combined. Recent studies show that, in Canada, cats-at-large (i.e. free-ranging house cats and feral cats) annually kill 5% of Canadian birds, that’s 269 million birds killed every year in Canada by cats. In the US, the numbers are even more shocking. Recent studies show that between 1.3 - 4 billion birds and 6.3 - 22.3 billion mammals are killed annually by cats. Around the world, the impacts are so great that the International Union for the Conservation of Nature (IUCN) now lists domestic cats as one of the world’s worst non-native invasive species.
I had the opportunity recently to review much of the data presented to the scientific community in newly released studies, and wrote a published article summarizing these impacts.
I’ve attached a copy of that article for your reference, following, and within it I provided the sources of the data.
TNR programs have been proven historically to be generally ineffective, and in fact often generate outcomes exactly opposite of what is desired. Studies show, feral cat numbers actually increase after a TNR program is introduced in many cases. Costs escalate and the problem is magnified not abated. Often more, not fewer, cats are released once the program is running, as people think the cats will simply be cared for so why bother going to an animal shelter with them?
The City of Kawartha Lakes is a green community, proud of its flora and fauna, that actively brands itself as an outdoors and wildlife haven. How then can it consider endorsing this devastating program that assuredly will needlessly kill millions of birds and other animals?
Cats-at-large and feral cats are not part of a natural community and never have been. They are as alien as Phragmites, Dog-strangling Vine and Emerald Ash Borer and more devastating by far. There is no place for them anywhere in a natural environment and they should be eradicated not fostered. I realize this is an emotional issue, but how can forfeiting the lives of millions of native species to cats be justified under any circumstances?
I hope staff will consider this information and do some careful research into the problems and impacts of feral cats before recommending any amendment to local bylaws. Would you please be kind enough to receive this letter as correspondence to Council and forward it to staff for their consideration.
If you have any questions please let me know. Thank-you for considering my comments.
Avocet Nature Services
This Thursday, May 3rd is the 25th anniversary of World Press Freedom Day. World Press Freedom Day was proclaimed by the UN General Assembly in December 1993, following the recommendation of UNESCO's General Conference.
This year's theme is “Keeping Power in Check: Media, Justice and The Rule of Law”.
The theme addresses the role of the media in sustainable development, especially during elections - as a watchdog fostering transparency, accountability and the rule of law.
In recent years organizations like Facebook and Google have rendered the news a fast food commodity, with little or no relevant journalistic value. This is dangerous, because it creates a general disrespect for the work that true reporters do every day.
Fake news is not new. Many of us can recall seeing headlines such as 'Woman gives birth to alien's baby' on tabloids seen at grocery store checkouts. Local gossip is another form of fake news. These erroneous forms of information serve no productive purpose and often lead to harmful consequences.
Only 13% of the world population enjoys a free press, where coverage of politics is robust, the safety of journalists is guaranteed, and state intrusion in media affairs is minimal. A partly free press functions in 42% of the world population. The remaining 45% lives in countries where a free press is non-existent. Governments of these countries tend to implement restrictive laws and censorship on freedom of press, usually justifying these actions as a necessary tool for national security against terrorism.
Apart from violating the right of freedom of expression, foundational to the free world, these restrictions place higher risks of violence, harassment and death on journalists.
An example of this could be seen on Tuesday of this week. An article by Rahim Faiez and Amir Shah, of The Associated Press, titled 'A black day for journalists in Afghanistan', reported how two suicide bomber attacks, killed 12 journalists.
The second suicide bomber had dressed up like a reporter and tried to blend in with the other journalists as they ran to cover the first bombing. Three journalists had been killed in the first bombing and nine more in the second bombing. Not to mention the numerous others that where injured.
As you read this free independent paper please appreciate the value you hold in your hands. The Standard News, as with other independent papers, consists of individuals who live the freedom of the press, believe strongly in holding our government accountable, and in the right to free speech, representing our community in print.
On that note, if you have an event or know of a local subject that you think would be of value to our community, please let us know. Email us at email@example.com.